Caring across the miles: how to support elderly loved ones when you live far away
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When you live far from an elderly parent or other relative, it’s natural to feel a mixture of concern and guilt. You want to be there for them, but geography gets in the way. However, while it’s not the same as popping round for a cup of tea, there are still plenty of ways that you can ensure their wellbeing, even from miles away.
Research shows that loneliness can be a challenge for many older people, and knowing they have someone in their corner, even virtually, can make a real difference. From taking advantage of new technologies, through to establishing a local network, here are some practical ways that you can stay involved in your loved one’s life from afar.
Establish a reliable local circle of support
Trusted help on the ground can really help both you and your elderly relative sleep better at night. Start by finding someone nearby who can be a dependable point of contact – this could be a neighbour, close friend, or a community volunteer. This person can, for example, check in after heavy snow or severe weather, pick up groceries regularly, or simply be a friendly face when you can’t be there.
Use tech to connect and monitor
Today’s tech is all about keeping us connected socially. Of course, a traditional weekly call is good, and phones are what the older generation prefer. But seeing each other’s faces can be even better. In addition to setting them up on social media so they can keep up with family happenings and message people, schedule in regular video chats via WhatsApp, Zoom, or FaceTime so you can easily pick up on visual cues about their health or living environment.
Simple devices like digital photo frames let you send new pictures instantly so they feel included in your life. Assistive tech, from smart video doorbells to personal alarm systems for accidental falls, can provide an extra layer of safety and independence.
Stay on top of finances and legalities from afar
Have an honest conversation about money and other financial practicalities before they become urgent. You might want to set up a joint account, arrange a power of attorney to give you legal authority to manage their finances if they become unwell, or learn the basics of local inheritance law through a lawyer in their jurisdiction if they’re in a different country. And when you do need to send funds for a big purchase or unexpected care costs, an international money transfer can be a straightforward and secure way to get financial help to them quickly.
Distance doesn’t mean less care
Supporting an elderly loved one from a distance is about combining emotional connection with practical planning. By building a local network, using tech to stay present and connected, and preparing for financial or legal needs, you can make sure they feel cared for and supported no matter how many miles are between you.
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